3 day fast

i have been having appetite problems lately and have felt the need to pray deep about a big decision i have considered making. i am going on the longest walk and have been trying to work things out before i leave. Getting money right now is hard with the economy being in recession. I'm thinking about calling gary a guy that offered me to help him and he would pay me to help him get trees cut down. At first i didn't like the idea but I've known him for years and never knew what he did. I used to help him all the time an chat with him at my job an the jobs before that.

The like for the longest walk is, http://longestwalk2008.com

I started my fast on Friday April 4th and did not know it till Saturday morning. I felt god was telling me to fast and so i went with it. All the pain in my hip has went away and same with my shoulders. They were paining me without even being on register. I think all the toxins in my system was a leading factor. i am less than an hour away from ending my fast. I have had nothing but water since Friday night, and a small cup of juice Sunday morning and this morning only because i felt ill and shaky, problems such as diabetes run in my family so i wanted to raise my blood sugar a little bit.

i went outside and prayed a little while today to help end my fastening.

missing someone close to my heart

well i dont know how things are going to be headed with the guy i was talking to.. that i was interested in... i have no clue if he is still interested in me, but eh if he decides he is not interested im going to like i decided before to take a break from it all an let myself grow closer with god. I miss my creator an i know for sure he misses me. That was my new years resolution and ive been keeping with it just not as closely as id like. Something in the back of my mind is telling me to just go to the wind an listen to all to what the spirits have to tell me. Many teachings they have taught me yet. and that i have yet to learn. Things have been tough with temptation and I know now where i stand with this thorn in my flesh. Is to please others so that i may be loved. Now i know that i can be loved without it, but to be loved by another whom has flesh is such longed for. Just i feel and am pressured to give the fruits of my flesh so that i may be loved equally by whom i give my affections to. Seems there is no love without sex now a days. My luck, i thought for a while that a friend of mine would have given me sweet love without expecting more, but he told me that he never goes agianst his word, that he would never love someone, and that he had to have sex in a relationship... he has now since went to texas. I very much miss him... as a friend mainly... i miss our converstaions and our laughs... our small short lived quarrels... and our shared griefs. Only thing i dont miss about him was how he assumed all women were the same... an how much a pessimist he was... seemed he could find no good in anything... and that beauty was no where to be found rather than searching for beauty in life right in front of him... sigh*

Its really hard for me to let go of people whom i hold close to my heart. I will never forget him an i hope we come to terms with each other. Hurst so much that he didnt believe me when i told him why i couldnt date him at that time. Hurt so much i acctually took his threats an obscene false accusations as an idea... an now i dont know where they are going... I know for sure that god has a plan for us an i hope dearly that he takes care of my big bad wolf... metal head... sigh*

ever time i hear one of the songs that was on his profile or that we exchanged i pray for him an his dreams. I see he did get one... an that was texas. :)

oh well we will see what happens

til then i will feel a place in my heart empty, for he helped me become who i am now. an now one knows that better than myself

for now... til later... walk in beauty... and take care of yours an your own

with love always

tiffany redfeather

frustration

well all its been a good while since i posted. Due to a complete disaster from viruses and men.... here i am yet again! ha yea im still around. the google thing did not help matters!

sweet hearts... tomarrow, tomarrow is gonna bring

ok all i think im gonna do some more later on.... :)

here is another pic of me to look at.... ha like you all wanna see me!! lmao

i love.... can you guess?

originally posted on december 05,2006 on myspace

i previously posted this as a bullitan. lets see if the public replys more to this one!!! ok all.... including non friends.... guess who i am talking about!!! an i will have no problem adding you~

can you guess who i am talking about... please read all of it then figure it out.

I LOVE

I love the way he makes me feel

i love the things he does

i love how he does the things he does

i love how he loves me

i love how much fun we have together

i love how he cares for others like there is no tomarrow

i love how he cares for me when i am sick

i love how when i ask for help he is always there

i love how he doesnt have any secrets

i love how he tells his stories

i love how he tells the truth

i love how he cares for me

i love how when i ask for help he is always there

i love when i ask for advise his is always the best

i love his promises he makes me

i love how he can never stay mad at me

i love the way he shows his affection

i love the way he touches my heart

i love the good things he does for people

i love the good things he does for me

i love how conciderate he is

i love how ill never be able to say how much i love about him!! :)

i love how i can always turn to him

i love the way he always provides for me

i love how he can never lie, you can tell

i love why he does these things he does

i love the way he guides me ever step of the way

i love the things he sends me

i love how he lets me do what i want

i love him for being him

i love the people he sets me up with

i love how he has changed me

i love how he brings me up when i am down

i love the way he makes me change my mind

i love the way he answers my questions

i love the way things just seem to unfold when i am at his side

i love how he sticks with me no matter how much i want him to go away sometimes

i love gifts hes givin me

i love the choices hes helped me decide

i love how he touches lives

i love how he has touched mine

i love the things he has made for me

i love how he continues to change me

i love the way he fixes things when you think they are broken forever

i love the Opportunities he throws my way

i love the way he makes me see things in a diffrent light

i love how he shows me things ive never seen before

i love how he speaks

i love how people love him

i love how people "try" to hate him

i love how he betters me

i love how he makes me see how much i have, even when i have so little compared to many

i love the way he feeds me

i love the colors he brings forth

i love how he gets jealous when i love another like i love him

i love the things he has made everyone else

i love how he makes me smile

i love the way he makes things taste

i love the talents he has taught me

i love the way he makes music sound

i love how he never does me wrong

i love the way he makes my hair feel

i love how he would never stear me wrong

i love how he makes the world turn

i love how fogiving he is

i love how he has saved my life a quite a few times

i love how he is always by my side

i love how he never falters

i love him for not lettin me have every thing i want

i love how he deals with people that wrong me

i love the he cools me down when no one else can

i love how he sedates all my hungers

i love how i can call on him an he is there

i love how he listens to me

i love how he remembers everything i tell him

i love how he knows me better than i know myself

i love how he is all i need

i love that no matter what i do, he will always love me

i love how he knows more than anyone ive ever known

i love him more than ill ever know

i love how he asks so little of me

i love him because i cant help but not to........

so go ahead message me asking who i am refering to?? maybe you might be right!! ha ha ha ha

go on ask me.....

ok all... all who view my blogs... my poetry... an all who veiw me an my life as it stands.


I was just wanting to tell you Im sorry for neglecting this site of mine. Im going to post what i have wrote on my myspace blog in here then ill make a good effort to keep up with this site!!

a simple poem about love.....

i was just reflecting to myself in the kitchen a few minutes ago about what i have observed in my life thus far..... and started to ryhme.... so im bloggin it....


what can make a person weak?
make you fall to someones feet,
even though you know they are practicing deceit,
love is what makes you weep,
like the juice from a cut rose does seep,
what can make you feel defeat?
a lover gone wrong with whom rose color you see.
who is worth your last drop of blood you do bleed?
of couse the one whose inner beauty does gleam.
as the lambs will before the slaughter bleat,
as so for you my heart does beat.
thou does know you wander of who i do speak,
for only time will tell in this game we try to cheat,
only honesty, loyalty are true to those who do seek,
this is not for the hearted who are meek,
nither of the ones who are cheek.
but the ones who truely need it are the bleak
they are the ones who need it more than a perfectionist neat,
ones who are lacking that sense of inner peace,
those whose anger and hatred does seethe,
afterwards a calm mind does follow after a mended breach,
so tis truth one does breathe,
if said love is such a need.

i have more of this poem... or what ever you might call it.... i am just too tired now to finnish it.... *tryin to laugh......
ha ha ha... yea.... well needed to find another way to tire myself out tonite.... routine was a lil' diffrent tonite folks!!

TO BE CONTINUED.......